Everyone agrees that funerals are one of the most important parts of the grieving process, something that is necessary for everyone after they lose someone. For people with disabilities, this is just as true and there are a few very simple things you can do to ensure they have the same opportunity to grieve as every non-disabled person. I’ve categorized these into five categories, depending on the disability or disorder or in one case, a living situation.
1. Mobility Disability: Make sure the space you hold the funeral is wheelchair accessible, with a wide and ADA compliant ramp. This includes not just the space you’re having the funeral in, but also the restrooms and the parking spaces. If you don’t know if a space is accessible, you can call the venue to check. Wheelchair users can also have things happen outside their control like a caregiver calling out sick that causes them to not be able to come in person. Having a virtual option, such as a livestream or Zoom can make sure they can attend in some capacity. If you are providing transportation for a wheelchair user, make sure the vehicle is wheelchair accessible. Although portable ramps can sometimes get over stairs, this is not a guarantee, so be sure to test it out if you decide to use one of these. These can also apply to people who use crutches, canes, walkers, braces, or have artificial limbs and/or have chronic pain.
2. Sensory Disorders: Not everyone experiences the world around them in the same way. Things like flashing lights, extremely bright lights, and extremely loud music or noises can all be distressing for people with sensory disorders whether it’s something they tell you or not. Many people either feel uncomfortable telling someone or don’t even know it themselves, so you should avoid these regardless of whether someone has told you about it or not.
3. Sight Disabilities: If someone is blind or low vision, give them materials written in braille and/or audio descriptions. Any photos or videos should be described for them with audio by whoever is speaking. Allow service animals inside the event, something that is required by law regardless of the venue’s pet policy.
4. Hearing Disability: If someone is deaf or hard of hearing, either give them a transcript, captions, or hire an American Sign Language interpreter. This will depend on the person’s preference. There are pro bono interpreters such as Pro Bono ASL who can translate either for free or at a very low cost.
5. Lack of Transportation: If the event space does not have access to reliable public transit like a subway or rapid transit system, find a ride for anyone attending who does not have a car. Buses and commuter trains are technically public transportation but almost always have significant delays, so do not have any attendees rely on them to get to the funeral. More than likely, they will have delays and they will miss the funeral.
Here are also a few general tips to keep in mind. Communication is always good between the organizers and the venue and also between the organizers and the disabled person. Tailor your accommodations for them based on your communication. In your communication with the disabled person, speak to them as you would any regular person. Don’t patronize them or speak to them as if they were a kid. Also, never ask for proof of disability. The two most important things to keep in mind are:
1. Have empathy for others
2. Communicate with others.
We hope this helps you make your funeral or other end of life or after death event inclusive to everyone. We also have a Funeral Accessibility checklist, which will be released soon and we’ll leave a link for it in this article once it is.
